Grievangelicals (D)

The religion of Satan (D)

(the Bipolar Character Impairment Glasses on those two ladies omg)

I don’t know if you guys have noticed but Democrats have some grievances that they would like to discuss at gunpoint after the next street orgy. JB Pritzker (above 🍔MIDDLE🍟), or as I like to call him ‘Buffetdolf Hitler’ (NOTE: I also call him Soufflédolf Hitler and, when I’m feeling fancy, Crème Brûléedolf Hitler) recently said “If you come for my people you gotta come through me.” He was talking about criminal migrants who partnered with a terrorist organization in order to invade the “United States” (which I put in quotes because it’s a fake country at this point) and leech benefits while swamping and destroying our hard-earned infrastructure and public services. (ANOTHER NOTE: Please never forget the Free Press article that explained how there are 1 million agricultural workers *total* in the US and that there is a *shortage of workers* after 20 million military-aged men, who are allegedly here to pick crops for Nancy Pelosi before she dies from syphilis, hired Satan-worshipping subhuman gangbangers to smuggle them into the “United States”).

I don’t want to bog down in the details of how hilarious it is for an obese billionaire Jew to refer to illiterate and destitute Guatemalans as “my people”, but I do want to point out that JB Pritzker, Merrick Garland, Alexander Vindman, and Alejandro Mayorkas are all in the Top Ten of ‘Jewish people who I am convinced have been hired by white supremacists to actively make antisemitism way worse by maintaining a high profile as a Jewish person while intentionally behaving like the most despicable godforsaken scumbag you can possibly think of’.

Regardless, Immigration Marxism is the final grievance. You can only conquer a country so much by pitting citizens against each other with Race Marxism and Gender Marxism and Sexuality Marxism and Class Marxism and all of the other conflict theory applications. Eventually you have to tell people that they need to help erase their country in order to be a good person, and that’s how you achieve Intergalactic Pansexual Vegan Communism (D). Criminal invaders are just seeking a better life!! Unlike 100% of people in human history who have all been seeking a better life. Might be better to ask if destroying America is a good plan, as opposed to just asserting that children like candy with tears in your eyes.

So why does Satan (D) love fake grievances so much? Well, he is The Father of Lies, so he’s a big fan of anything fake (EVEN MORE NOTES: Satan (D) probably has transitioned to a chick with a beard at this point but we can still call her a him). But he/she/herm is also known as The Accuser, so if there are lots of grievances then that gives The Accuser lots of stuff to accuse you of, like racism and xenophobia and Beige Supremacy (please reference the Hispanic vote for Trump if you are not up to date on Beige Supeemacy).

Satan (D) is also known as The Day Star, or in other words somewhat dim like Joy Orenthal Reid. But if you’ve ever watched Claire Orenthal McCaskill and Mika Orenthal Brzezinski on Morning Joe you understand why Satan (D) is also known as The Roaring Lion, meaning predatory, violent, and annoying. The bottom line is that the fake grievances promoted by Grievangelicals give them accusatory moralizing power while also converting their followers into weak and disabled narcissists with an external locus of control: The Oppressor.

In closing, I would like to discuss a date I went on last week. She’s a very nice girl. She is half Native American and very pretty like Pocahontas kinda. Unlike Elizabeth Warren, who is only 1/1024th Native American and looks like Cruella Deville at all times.

Anyways, we hit it off and we went back to her place and that’s when the fireworks started. I don’t mean sexually, I’m just saying that she had fireworks at her house because she’s Native American. By the way, why do Indians sell most of the really good fireworks on Indian reservations when fireworks are primarily used on the 4th of July where we celebrate how we stole all of their land? Seems counterintuitive. Anyways, so we launched some bottle rockets and roman candles and then we had sex and it had been a while for me and I forgot how much using a condom ruins the mood. Here we are, enjoying ourselves, and we are both totally in the mood to spread STDs and dammit if that condom didn’t ruin our plan!! Oh well.

I am sorry I skipped over ‘Gland Acknowledgements’. I will get to it eventually. But I think my next newsletter will be called ‘Videocracy’ and it will be a discussion of our Zoom Meeting parasitic economy where 50% of the people attended college and produce absolutely nothing of value. We will have to see. Cheers!!