Pino Egregio

President In Name Only

Well, I guess I am banned from The Free Press for a month, so my only recourse is posting another horrifyingly offensive newsletter of my own. I actually don’t mind being banned because, unlike the major platforms which have monopolies, this is just a popular newsletter that I’m banned from so it’s fine. If The Free Press ever came to dominate 80% of the newsletter market the way that Google dominates search I would consider the ban to be treasonous and I would want Bari and Nellie in prison. But as it is it’s fine.

I guess I would have appreciated some transparency on the escalation from 24 hour bans to a 1 month ban. Also, I would appreciate some transparency on the subhuman communist pieces of shit who have been emailing The Free Press aggressively demanding that I be removed, because you know there are hundreds of them. I’m not using ‘subhuman’ as a pejorative or hyperbole. I genuinely do not view people who do that sort of thing as human beings. If you don’t like an opinion and you email someone to have the opinion removed, especially when there is a mute button, you are a rodent who should be soaked in gasoline and set on fire by the government after a fair trial.

I briefly want to weigh in on the JD Vance “childless cat lady” comment. If you tell a joke about childless cat ladies it’s a lot like telling a joke about lawyers. When you tell the joke about how 1,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean being attacked by sharks with AIDS is “a good start”, many lawyers will laugh because they know the lawyers you are talking about.

Same thing with childless cat ladies. There are lots of women with cats who do not have kids, for whatever reason, who will laugh at that joke. That’s because they know who you are talking about and it’s not them. They personally aren’t communists. They don’t hate kids. They aren’t possessed by Satanic resentment. They know they aren’t the childless cat ladies you’re talking about. The women who aren’t laughing, and especially the ones who are angry at JD Vance, *are* the ones you are talking about, and they know it.

Additionally, I do not want to hear anything ever about how you are so empathetic towards the women who can’t have children naturally, from the evil Democrat cocksuckers who run a nationwide network of abortion factories with black smoke pouring from the smokestacks. The smoke is black because most of the babies are black.

The title of this trash heap is ‘Pino Egregio’ because someone said that Biden is ‘President in name only’ (PINO) and Biden is the most egregious version of this that has ever happened; hence egregio. I find this funny because dipshit whore wine moms are the only reason we are in this situation, and they love their Pinot Grigio so it’s a pun hahahaha.

While Biden’s carcass is the most egregious example of this particular Manchurian conspiracy, there are other examples of this from the past. Most notably Woodrow Wilson. I think there was also a problem with FDR which reminds me of a joke I did about FDR when I was doing standup in college. The joke was that FDR didn’t actually have polio, he just had a boner during math class in 8th grade and the teacher asked him to come to the blackboard and he made up an excuse why he couldn’t and so he just had to pretend he had polio going forward so as not to blow his cover.

Enjoy your weekend. Feel free to post comments in TFP about how I am banned.