Osama Bin Loudoun
The stumpy Italian guy who helped close the schools in Loudoun County continues his pseudoscience jihad against freedom
Youngkin may have reopened Loudoun County for business, but many still struggle under Fauci’s reign of terror. Is Petito Mussolini a good nickname for him? Because he’s tiny and Italian….
Briefly, Democrats are complaining about the Senate again, and the Electoral College, and how it’s all unfair, and I feel the need to remind everyone again that these people hate the United States. They may like this country, somewhat, mainly because there’s a bunch of shit for them to steal that they can use for Utopia Attempt Version 15.03.2.001.44, but they truly hate the concept of the United States.
Yes, Democrats, Wyoming gets the same number of votes in the Senate as California. That’s because you’re supposed to do all of your hair-brained shit in California instead of cramming it down on everyone else.
But if you ask many Democrats, free healthcare and solar powered dildos in California is not good enough for them. No no no. Not for these dickheads. Their ideas are soooo awesome that they have to try them everywhere all at once so that any failure will be maximally catastrophic.
California is basically as big as Germany with the same size economy. Really, Democrats? The equivalent of Germany isn’t enough for you? You must dominate the whole of Europe as well? Okay, good talking to you, Adolf Hitler.
The best is when they say that if they do it at the state level it won’t work because people will come from other states to use their programs. Nope. Sorry guys. You’ve been arguing for 40 years that destitute illiterate people with no resources and no skills who don’t speak English flocking to where you live is GOOD for the economy. So if some poor people from Ohio show up you should be excited because that will just make you even more wealthy because poor people with no skills are our strength!!! Assholes.
Okay sorry, now to Fauci. He’s still the Chief Medical Advisor to the President and I’m beginning to think that when he heard ‘Advisor’ he thought they said “add Pfizer”. But please, don’t listen to me. Consult with your doctor before getting your fourth injection of the vaccine for the COVID variant that is no longer circulating.
Fauci thought that he got a real sick burn in on Rand Paul the other day by pointing out that Rand Paul was raising money with the slogan “Fire Dr. Fauci” on his website. This is why Senators really need to hire me to pass them handwritten notes during these hearings because if I was Rand Paul I would have said
(and these are the actual words that immediately popped into my head this isn’t a ‘jerk store’ zinger)
“Yeah, Tony, that’s there because I have to raise money to run my reelection campaign and people donate money to me based on me promising to do the things that they want me to do the most as their representative, and you may find this surprising, but, the millions of people you fucked in the ass with your dogshit pseudoscience, they really really want you fired……I yield back.”
And then I would spit a little bit of chewing tobacco into a Bud Light bottle while making eye contact with Mazie Hirono.
And then I would press my microphone button again and say
“Sorry, fucked in the asses, plural…….yield back.”
Isn’t it weird that a 5’2” guy who needs to sit in a booster seat to eat dinner is also really gung-ho about booster shots?
Oh and I should comment on how Republicans who attack AOC really want to date her. She’s right. I want to date her. Not because I actually want to date her but because I want to have sex with her and dating her is a price I’d be willing to pay in exchange for the sex. But that’s not the reason she’s being attacked. It’s two things at the same time, sweetheart. People want to date you AND they think you’re extraordinarily stupid. Both are true. Speaking of ‘two things at the same time’, AOC, if we get Ilhan drunk and tell her I hate America, do you think we could get her in the sack?
Yeah, me too. Except Kevin's got some creative ass ways of stating what's on our minds ;-) He should go on Rogan's show. That would be a fuckin' hoot.
I love this Substack because you say what I'm thinking.