Ass Forwards

Bravely marching forward with ass-backwards policies into an old tomorrow

I’m sure people somewhere in the blogosphere have mentioned this already but Kamala’s slogan of ‘Forward’, where we leave the past behind unburdened by what has been, is something she plagiarized from Mao Zedong and his Great Leap Forward, which went poorly. It would be nice if someone other than a blogger, like someone on Trump’s staff for example, mentioned this.

Trump would say to his campaign staffer “Who is this Dong character? Is that a pseudonym? Many people are asking about this Dong fellow and I tell them that he is, and I say this very powerfully, that he is a ‘Low Energy Dong’. Sad!” I mean if Kamala’s campaign was talking about how we need more ‘Lebensraum’ would it be up to me to point out the historical parallels or would a political professional pick up on this and mention it to the voters?

In addition to being as vague as possible, it is also asinine because we are always moving forward no matter what. That’s how time works. This reminds me of their rhetorical smear where they accuse people of being afraid of change and/or afraid of people who are different than them. Of course they always accuse you of being fearful (1,000 different fake phobias) because that is a linguistic strategy that stealthily paints you as weak, dangerous and irrational; like a cornered animal. Regarding change, if you set my nutsack on fire that would represent a change. How about you specify exactly what kind of change we are talking about, you creepy lowlife jackass. Regarding people who are different than you, that’s literally everyone on earth. So what you’re really talking about is non-white immigrants. The only reason Democrats think that importing non-whites triggers “racists” is because they aren’t aware that the US is already heavily non-white. This is because they are useless parasites with no skills who attended college and who have taken their administrative interference class grift money and segregated themselves by living in all-white neighborhoods. The real reason average people are concerned about importing illiterate destitute foreigners with no skills is because they are spit-roasting geese in the parking lot of Home Depot and they are a huge burden and this particular pack mule, America, is already overloaded and it’s about to tip over, fart, and die.

The funny thing about moving “forward” is that these are the same people who regularly boast about how we used to have higher taxes on the rich (back when we also had separate water fountains). So we can’t go back because going back is bad because of slavery. So we need to move forward by going back to the old tax rates. Got it. We need to move forward by going back to using fucking windmills. We need to move forward by going back to price controls. We need to move forward by going back to when we didn’t have firearms and roving bandits could casually ransack your house and sexually assault your daughter. We need to move forward by reenacting WWII for no reason except with thousands of nukes this time. We need to move forward by chasing the Jews out of Israel, which has never been tried before. We need to move forward by turning kids into Biblical-era eunuchs. We need to move forward by uniting the workers, which is a brand new plan we just came up with. We need to move forward by relitigating slavery. We need to move forward by worshipping Mother Earth, which is a fresh new idea, and by doing this cool new rain dance that just came out. It all makes sense if you are a Democrat and you were born with Clown Syndrome. (I also have a joke about how women act like they are mentally challenged any time there is a wedding. It’s called Gown Syndrome.)

I can’t promise anything but I’m drafting a newsletter called My Potty, My Choice. We will see how it goes. And I’m back from my Free Press ban. Yay!!!